Fable or Fact

I’m having a major popstar moment 😉
In this blog I am going to discuss some of the prejudices people have been having about me.
Are they true, or not?

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She is from a large city

“Where are you from” is one of the most difficult question to answer.
Do you mean where I was born, where I spend most my childhood or where I live now?
People look at my passport and see a capital city. People know where I am currently living, which is one of the bigger cities in the Netherlands.

People being from a city are often perceived as richer and supercilious by the “villagers”.
Most my colleagues are from or near the small town where the company is based.
Apparently they can’t help but think that I match the “big city person” perfectly.

Most of them don’t care to listen to that fact I spend the age of 5 till 20 in a town with a population of 13.000 habitant. Then moved abroad to a town with 7.000 citizens.

Conclusion: small fact, but mostly FABLE! 


She is 
Muslim

Let me first start by saying that I have NO ISSUE with anyone from any culture or religion. 

I could imagine why some people could think this, given the fact that I was born in a partly Islamic country and I am a vegetarian.
But how high is the probability that Muslim parents would give their child a VERY typical Christian name??

Western European people are extremely ignorant when it comes to the foreigner topic.
Anyone not being from their country is immediately judged in a certain negative way.

Conclusion: Fable. if anything, I was brought up a conservative Catholic way.

She never does anything out of her comfort zone

Just because you never took the time to get to know me, doesn’t mean you can bluntly state something like this about me.

Aren’t most people born with pretty much the same comfort zone?
Our parents take care of us the best they can. They choose the school closest to home for us. We hang out with the kids from the neighborhood.

I’m not even sure what “out of the comfort zone” means.

I moved abroad when I was 20, even though before I have hardly ever left that small town I lived in.
I was a technical Instructor by the age of 21, even though I could barely speak during school presentations.
I have spoken to random people on the public transport, even though I was almost too shy to speak to my own family.
I have been in school plays. I have been on many job interviews.
I had to perform in a language I was not at all comfortable with, at work.

For my own taste, I have done enough.
So if people could just stop telling me this, I can finally breathe in peace.

Conclusion: Big Fat FABLE

She is too young

Too young for this job.
Too young to understand life and what more is coming.
Too young to worry about her pension.
Too young to settle down.
Too young to say “I’m getting older”.

How’s that for you to judge?
Yes, I take life serious.
Yes, I want to work hard so that later I can take that chill pill!

Conclusion: INSANE FABLE. 

She has a problem with expressing her feelings 

Hellllloooo!? Have you read my blog 😉

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What are some of the prejudices people have been having about you? 

28 thoughts on “Fable or Fact

  1. Well I’ve always been perceived as a very open girl who loves to party and someone who had many boyfriends in the past. On the contrary I am an introvert who ended up marrying the only man who asked me for marriage☹️☹️ I was not expected to be a stay home mom and cook lavish dinners which again was so wrong…

  2. Thanks for this entertaining post! Well, once someone told me I’m a very “intraverted/shy” individual back in elementary school. Well that’s a big fat fable. That year I performed a Latin dance on the school talent show and shut that “shy” argument down! 🙂

  3. Let’s see –

    Because I am a pastor – that I must be a poltical conservative.
    (I am conservative on a few issues – and very much not os on others)

    My heart problems are caused by my obesity
    – I have a genetic syndrome that affects the heart, spine, eyes, etc – and until it became a major force in my life I was skinny – too skinny

    Because I am intelligent, I must be driven by logic, not intuition
    Just the opposite – I am also a musician… therefore I must be a flake?

    Great article!

  4. Why would anyone think your Muslim??? lol. I’m a Muslim revert (from catholicism) – and never did I ever get the impression you were Muslim… where were you born ? If you don’t mind me asking?

  5. I think I am (I know I was) perceived as a Prude! I’m not loose, I don’t party, I’m not into one night stands,drinking, or drugs. I am a Christian.

    What does Vegetarianism have to do with being a Muslim? I am Vegetarian and a proud American!

  6. People often think I am arrogant because I often keep to myself at parties or places where I hardly know people. I don’t do that because I think I am better, I do so because I am afraid I won’t fit in. Big difference. When I was asked to become an instructor at my local gym because they needed someone and I was rocking that particular class, people called me stuck up because I accepted that offer and eventually became a good instructor, someone who took her job seriously AND had fun! So to others I am, apparently, a stuck up, know-it-all, arrogant snob, while I am just insecure, professional and enjoying myself when I happen to actually be good at something for a change!

    I say, you just can’t win ’em all!

  7. I know these prejudices. I just don’t like how people can be so judgmental these days. People may find it strange that I don’t drink at a party. I don’t want to explain myself. I also hate the questiond about what I’m doing with my life. Most of them don’t care and just want to gossip about it. I don’t own anyone an explanation. I loved your pictures. Did you draw them by yourself? So you do live in the Netherlands? So cool, I’m half Dutch, half Spanish but live in Spain right now.

  8. Maybe I’m old fashion but I think the modern men no longer sees it as their duty to ask a girl to marry him. I remember the stories of my dad how he asked my mum to marry him. To him it was an honor and it made him feel like a man more than ever.

    I hear many stories nowadays that the girl asks to marry.
    It’s not wrong, but I hope that will never have to be the case for me.

  9. People judge you and they always will have some opinion about you..well, few might get you right! In my case, people think I am very outspoken and open minded, which is true to some extent but the truth is that I am quite conservative with few things and thoughts.. 🤗

  10. I was born in Bosnia!
    That’s the first reaso.
    And then as soon as you say you don’t eat meat, they’ll suggest “something als than pork”. 🙄

  11. I can only imagine people might think that of a pastor!
    That’s why it is important that people from the curch go to schools or elderly homes.
    Does your curch do that btw?

    Ha! I get the logic vs. Intuition. But it’s never that black & white, is it😉

  12. I recognize this a lot.
    I’ve heard some people at work saying for the same reason as you described.
    Since when have people forgotten about that someone being shy and anxious is an actual thing.
    I don’t do well in groups, but love face to face concersations!

  13. Oh man!
    My parents never allowed me to drink before I finished university.
    I respected their wish, but even now I don’t have a big desire.
    It is considered weird for whatever reason 🙄

    Yes! I draw them quite a lot for my posts. These are called Pensive Pinapple and Skeptical Valentino !
    Most of them you can find in this blog:

    https://benkofficial.com/2018/04/07/whats-your-mood/

  14. I really enjoyed reading the “out of my comfort zone” part of the post. It was full of power. Go you!

    People think that just because I can be quiet I am shy. I can be quiet for a few reasons, but definitely not because I’m shy.

    Some think I’m arrogant/ stuck up just because I have an opinion and I fight for what’s right.

    Just some of the examples.

  15. We do – though it is harder to get into schools. The American idea of separation of church and state, which originally was that the state can’t have an official church, has affected some of what we do! (and in some cases – they have reasons because of pastors that are more about making behavioral clones rather than teaching about love, mercy and reconciliation.

  16. Oh my! Amazing how different people from around the world have different thought process’. I also didn’t know that Bosnia had many Muslims lol. When I think Bosnia I think catholic. Kakos ste? Volim te! I dated a Croatian in my teens lol. Forgive my ignorance if the languages are totally different. Only things I remember haha.
    I wanted to be vegan at one stage, still consider it. Just haven’t taken the plunge and don’t know how sustainable it would be for me!

  17. It’s a complicated history of Bosnia which I still fail to understand, so no worries 😉
    Indeed, Croatian is the same language!
    So I’m guessing you have visited Croatia as well? I love that country! 😀

  18. 😉

    I get the same about quietness.
    People ask me why I’m quiet during lunch.
    If there would only be a 1 second break, I would say something. BUT THERE ISN’T!
    Also, I am not even interested in the topics they talk about (local football club, what’s been on TV).

    So I stopped going for lunch. Now some think I’m feeling “too good for them”.
    WHUT?
    Sigh.

  19. I lived the first half of my adult life according to what I thought were others’ expectations of me and what job I should do, how I should look etc. All the while not realising that it was me who was doing this to myself. Now I have the freedom to be me and I avoid negative or grumpy people and walk away or keep silent when others are being so..

  20. In both the schools my daughters attended I received the same prejudicial treatment at first from other mothers who thought I was not appreciable simply because I usually like to dress well and I wear big earrings and necklaces and because ,being Italian,I was supposed to be a snob.Someone once she knew me better even told me that expecting my gratitude that she was now willing to be my friend because I was not that bitch she thought I was🤷🏻‍♀️

  21. Ugh, meeting other mums at school. My mum never liked it either and I’m sure I will never like it!
    You proved them wrong! 😀

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