The main reason why I hated school was because of this one subjects: “Physical Education”.
For 3 hours in a week I got the chance to embarrass myself during basketball, high jumping or acrobatics.
I was not good at this, I had no intention to be and didn’t understand how this was going to make me more intelligent.
The absolute worst thing, and in my eyes the cause of bullying, was when people got to pick their own team.
The “teacher”, who of course wanted to remain the good guy, always choose two kids from the popular range.
Those two always choose their equally popular friends, until it was down to the 4 loser kids of the class. I was included in that last pick.
People ended up just “stuck with me” being on their “team”.
Although there have been signs me being sad, shy and ashamed of this, only once the “teacher” noticed me crying.
He listen to what I had to say and told me that next I could choose my team.
I was quite over the moon.
I had made a list at home and proudly presented the names during the next PE class.
You might have guessed, it were all the popular kids.
After that hour the teacher approached me.
“Have you learned nothing? You know how it is not being picked! Why didn’t choose those are always with you in the bottom 4?!”, he rambled.
I teared up.
For the next few weeks I felt horrible about myself.
So very hypocrite.
Today, after surviving many years of being bullied and left out, I thought about this occasion.
How easy and manipulative was it of the “TEACHER” to say this to a 12 year old?
He was the one who introduced us to the concept of choosing your own team.
He could have taught us about working together as a team.
He could have taught us about each individual’s value.
He could have made us aware about bullying.
He could have blamed this on himself instead of a child.
In the rare months that I wasn’t bullied, others were.
I was never brave enough to step up, unfortunately.
I was just happy that for that moment nobody was paying attention to me.
That did change.
Not too long ago a female mentioned that someone was “super ugly” and had no sense of fashion.
This time I did step up.
“Unless you have studied the reflection in the mirror, you have no right of speech”.
Maybe this was too offensive, but some people have to learn the hard way.
She gave me the usual bullshit response of “This is a free country, I can say whatever I like”.
“Of course you can, but offending someone is showing weakness. And my recommendation is not to do that”.
Before she could say anything, I walked away.
But I did feel powerful.